Thursday, January 27, 2011

I Can Explain... Silly Bandz


First appeared on Retirement News Weekly, Issue 31

When I was in elementary school, we had these things called Pogs™. Based on the idea that if children were playing with bottle caps they’d play with anything, pogs were circular cardboard disks with different pictures on the front. Some children used them to play the Pogs game. This included making a pile of pogs and then hitting them with what was called a “Slammer,” which was a thicker pog. Others just traded and collected pogs and stored them in tubes. Because I, too, collected pogs, I can only introduce you to this decade’s equivalent with slight judgement and a little hypocrisy. If you have seen kids with elastic bands on their wrists or strange elastic bands moulded into shapes, and you’re wondering just how important marketing and popularity is… well… I can explain.

Silly Bandz are a brand of elastic bands that come in hundreds of different shapes (from animals to super heroes to internet vernacular). Not only are there funky shapes, but Silly Bandz also come in a variety of colours including tie-dye, glitter, and glow-in-the-dark. These bands are worn on the wrist (often many at a time) like a fashion accessory for children. When removed from the wrist, they return to their original fun shape. If you’re looking for a more detailed description on what these things are, because there’s no way such a simple concept would sweep the country this fast, there isn’t one. I mean, they can also be used as actual elastic bands. Otherwise, Silly Bandz are nothing more than colourful fun-shaped elastic bands.

The Japanese were the first to shape elastic bands into animals. But Robert Croak, the head of the company that makes Live Strong bracelets, spotted them at a convention and realized their true potential. He started manufacturing them in the U.S.A. and instead of marketing them as elastic bands to offices, he targeted them towards children as a fashion accessory. First, they were sold online; within a year, they were in stores across the southern United States; and in no time, they were making their way up the coast. Before long, they were Amazon’s bestselling toys, and there were knock off brands like Logo Bandz, Cool Bandz, Zany Bandz and Googly Bandz.

But why are they so popular? It’s likely a combination of a few things:

#1) First, it taps into the collector’s mentality. As a species, we want to gather and collect large quantities of valuable assets (the term “valuable” being loosely used). Whether its comic books, Pokemon cards, Pogs, or elastic bands, we want to “catch them all.”

#2) Second, Silly Bandz have become popular amongst youngsters. Those that have them try to have more than other kids, and the competition spirals into collecting as many as possible just for the sake of having more. Additionally, those that don’t have them are, at times, ostracized.

#3) Finally, when you’re young and can find something that speaks to your personality (animal shapes, Barbie shapes, etc.), you express yourself!

Now Silly Bandz aren’t all fun and games. They’ve been banned in many classrooms for being too distracting. Older teens are using them to symbolize what level of sexual activity they’ll engage in. Some minor injuries have even been reported when Bandz were pulled up a child’s arms, which cut off circulation. However, for the most part, Silly Bandz are just one more child-centric fad that will disappear as quickly as you can say, “Beenie Babies.”

In any case, if you’re wondering what it means when you grandson gives you an elastic band shaped like a Power Ranger… I can explain!

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Act Your Age... Dancing to the Music of the 70s, 80s, and 90s

First appeared on Retirement News Weekly, Issue 31

I hate dancing.

Correction: I hate dancing without a partner.

Certainly one can find joy in dancing with someone you love. And surely one can appreciate dancing with someone you’ve just met. But for a man, dancing alone is akin to giving a speech in English to thirty drunken strangers when all you can speak is Mandarin. Despite this, I still go “dancing” and it’s a testament to just how much I enjoy the company of my friends and how eager I am to get out of my apartment on a Saturday night. This week, like many before, I was invited to attend Retro Night at the Paragon Theatre. This local club plays music from the past four decades once a month. Of course, I was going to go with only slight trepidation.

Wearing a Ghostbusters T-shirt and a hoodie, the closest thing I have to retro clothing, I headed to the Paragon around 11. The frigid air cut through my thin sweater as I climbed in the cab with the troop of girls coming with me. The line at the club’s entrance was short and after having our IDs checked at the door, we entered the main lobby. Once in the bar, I got a beer as the girl’s rushed to the dance floor. I in no way encourage indulging in social lubrication, but when it comes to dancing having a beer in hand doesn’t hurt. I could see the girls on the floor having a ball. After another swig, I headed to the dance floor.

When I’m uncomfortable in a situation I begin to study my surroundings like a scientist. Thus, on the dance floor with dozens of my peers grinding and jumping to retro music, I sought direction through observation. I searched the crowd looking for any man who seemed to know what he was doing in hopes that I could mimic his actions. What I’ve come to realize is that while women seem to dance with purpose and joy, men dance like they’ve just soiled themselves and hope no ones looking. One arm up, one arm down, awkwardly looking around... or maybe that’s just me.

Through these observations, I’ve narrowed down what men do on the dance floor to five moves. They include:

#1) The Sway, when a man stands on the dance floor, usually holding a beer or drink, and sways side to side.

#2) The Cool Guy Nod, when a man leans against a table, bar, or post and just nods his head to music.

#3) The DJ, when a man pumps his fist in the air or air plays an imaginary turntable.

#4) The Grind, when a man finds a woman, stands behind her, puts his hands on her hips, and wiggles… in a way that doesn’t look incredible silly. This one often gets more graphic, but that’s the tame version.

And #5) Wild Abandonment, when a man just wants to dance and with wild abandon throws himself into his moves.

Without fail, there’s at least one of these on every dance floor. I spotted him early on that night. He kind of looked like a young Patrick Swayze in a flowery t-shirt with three too many buttons undone. With little inhibition and a lot of hip thrusting, he danced alone while people watched with dropped jaws. The occasional girl tried to engage him for the sake of humor, mockery, or an interesting story.

Personally, I tend to go with the sway. Far from cool, but as I feel awkward already, it tends to bring the least amount of attention my way. I find myself incredibly conscious of the degree of my sway. Am I swaying too much? Do I look like the hand on a grandfather clock? Maybe I’m not swaying enough. What if I look like I’m just standing there? The easiest thing a guy can do with a group of girls he knows is prevent unwanted guys from joining in. It gives you something to do. So in between my sways, I’d spot the girl’s trying to thwart unwanted advances and stand between them and the violator.

As the night progressed, the dance floor got more and more crowded so that my degree of sway became less of an issue. I could barely move. Being a giant, my concern shifted to a fear that I’d crush someone if I moved too quickly. Streamers flew through the air and beach balls bounced through the crowd. People tried to slip past me as they made their way to the bathroom or another group of friends. I was left wondering if I was wet with my own sweat or the writhing bodies surrounding me. One of the guys who’d met us at the bar saw my discomfort and pulled me aside.

“You just need to point and stare intensely in random directions,” he said with only a hint of mockery in his voice. “That’s the best dance move.” He proceeded to demonstrate and the stranger beside him joined in.

We eventually made our way to the outskirts of the dance floor and people started to sit down: a little tired and a little bored. One of the girl’s we’d come out with was a salsa dancer and I took her hand and asked for tips. She proceeded to show me some moves: a lot of hip wiggling and special steps. I failed horribly, but when asked to dip her, I was all aces. I think I’m an excellent dipper.

“If I were to dance with a girl, could I rely entirely on dipping?” I asked her.

“Probably not,” she replied and laughed. Oh well.

We stayed out until around 1:30 and then took a cab home. A night well spent. The music that played during the night ranged from Duran Duran to Air Supply to Def Leppard. But it didn’t matter that the music was at its peak popularity before most of us were born. Dancing to these ageless songs connected us to a different time in the same way that in 15 to 20 years we’ll be finding Snoop Dogg and Eminem in the oldies section of an online store. So dance! Dance for exercise! Dance for fun! Or just dance to reconnect to a different time and place!

Saturday, January 15, 2011

I Can Explain... 2012 & The End of the World




First appeared on Retirement News Weekly, Issue 30

Welcome to the last year of your life! That is, if the John Cusack movie 2012 and certain doomsaying conspiracy theorists are right. According to academics who study the Mayan calendar, 2012 marks the end of the thirteenth and last cycle of our present world. The more pessimistic of these theorists would suggest that this means calamity and the ultimate destruction of mankind. But what is the real significance of 2012 to the Mayans and the practical implications of 2012 for the rest of us? Don’t start collecting canned goods and building an ark quite yet... I can explain!

Our current calendar is divided into seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, decades, centuries, and millennia. These measurements of time are not universal however. The Mayans measured the passing of time differently. There were days, uinals (20 days), tuns (18 uinals), k’atun (20 tuns), and b’ak’tuns (20 k’atuns or 144,000 days). The Mayans believed that there existed three worlds prior to this one, but due to Godly bloopers, it was only the fourth world (this world) that got inhabited by people. Each of the previous three worlds lasted for 13 b’ak’atuns.

This is where 2012 comes into the picture. According to the best analysis of Mayan archaeology and scholarship, our world’s final b’ak’atun ends on December 21 or 23, 2012. It is suggested that the end of this calendar would have incredible significance for Mayans. The problem with the conspiracy theories is that we’re not entirely sure what that significance would be.

Some suggest that the end of the k’atun would be a time of celebration in the same way that the 1999/2000 New Years Eve was a time of celebration for us because of the arbitrary significance attached to such a big number change. Others suggest that this would mark a time of great spiritual enlightenment for the Mayans. And others still suggest that it would mark the end of the world... or at least humanity. These theorists have not yet heard about the Justin Bieber documentary Never Say Never 3D, which comes out in February of this year and proves that humanity will have been long lost before 2012.

Many argue that 2012 is over hyped and that, like Y2K and the new millennia, we’ll experience the changeover with the regular amount of discomfort and disappointment of New Year’s Eve. Whatever the outcome of 2012, the potential tragedy certainly made a decent movie.

If this is the last year, what can you really do about it? Hugging your loved ones a little tighter, couldn’t hurt. Settling old scores and finding peace and happiness in the everyday, wouldn’t make things any worse. But if you remain concerned, keep a vigilant eye to the sky, spot the massive meteorite heading towards earth, and wonder what sort of damage it could do... well... I can explain!

Happy New Year!

Sunday, January 2, 2011

Energy Awareness Ads for Trident Newspaper

My second co-op term was as a Communication Assistant for Formation Safety and Environment, a branch of the Department of National Defense. In this position, I was asked to design 12 advertisements to promote energy efficiency. Because I was working with limited funding and software, I relied on Microsoft Publisher to design these ads. They were published on a monthly basis in the Trident Newspaper.














SeaFest Event Posters

My first job (other than cutting fish row for a month one summer) was as a Festival Organizer Intern. In this position I planned a Mayor's Tea, a Fish Feast, and a variety of other events. I also designed posters to promote these festivities. Below, you will find two of these posters. One promoted the Yarmouth Lobster Festival, while the other promoted the 30th Anniversary of the SeaFest. Both were distributed throughout the town of Yarmouth.


Encouraging Waste Seperation at DND

During my time as a Communication Assistant at Formation Safety and Environment, I was in charge of planning a week-long campaign to encourage proper waste separation throughout the navy bases in Halifax. As part of this campaign, I designed a helpful handout and new posters to put on all waste receptacles.






Event Posters for Formation Safety & Environment

At Formation Safety and Environment, I planned a variety of appreciation dinners, coffee fundraisers, and the end-of-year Christmas feast. Below are some posters I designed to promote such events.


CCHC Event Mail Out

While working as a Fund Development Project Coordinator at the Cobequid Community Health Centre Foundation (quite the mouth full!), I was asked to design postcards for a mail out to encourage people to participate in the Walk/Run Event. Using Adobe Indesign, I designed the following postcards:




CCHC Mail Out

At the Cobequid Community Health Centre Foundation, I designed postcards for a mail out to encourage planned giving. Using Adobe Indesign, I designed the following postcards: